When One Falls

Throughout our whole life, we always have fallen in terms of our spiritual life. Even though living in the grace of light has always been a desire there never was a time that we haven't fallen in the holes of darkness. Literally, there were always times that we sinned grievously, then doubted. It usually results from our weak and selfish human nature. As a consequence, we tend to lag behind in our pursuit of the spiritual grace. In other words, we stop attending church, we cease to pray and we pretend that we are alright. However, deep in our hearts we do feel remorse yet we tend to fight back because of our pride. At times our guilt would have us say "I'm too ashamed even to talk to God!". By this, we are assuming our own fate as sinners, that we no longer deserve to have a place before Him, that we have no hope and that we will, for the rest of our life, rot in hell being sinful. However, this attitude is not going to help us in any way, and that for being steadfast in these assumptions, we surely will rot in hell! To sum up, we make our pride rule our life and this pull us backward from God's grace. For sure, none of us wants to be in the eternal fire but forget the simple truth that we can actually escape that punishment. Well, we do know how to be spared from condemnation - that we just need to get up, feel sorry, take the sacraments and try hard not to commit the same sins again. Nonetheless, we still find it hard and lose patience with the cycle that repeats itself. We lose count and think that God's "seventy times seventy times" have but all ran out. We go on living a wretched life, unable to regain the grace that's supposed to be free, abundant and impartial. We fail to get up from the fall and choose to crawl. We refuse to lift our hands to God always eagerly waiting to pick us up. We choose to do so, because we lack one basic attitude - humility, which is one thing that God wants from us.